As my high school graduation grew nearer and nearer back in 2008, I heard time and time again how college would lead to all sorts of things. At first, I took the words seriously but as everyone began to sing them over and over again I gradually reduced the meaning behind them. It’s only now, as a junior in college, that I realized how correct they all were.

The summer after graduation was gone in a blink and before I knew it, everyone had scattered and began to take their lives in all kinds of directions. I (and some of my friends which I will admit, made me feel a lot better about my choices) decided to stay in the area. Certain circumstances prevented me from moving out of my home and it wasn’t long before I felt like if I had fallen behind.

Life after high school, as it was explained to me, was supposed to be this mind-blowing experience where someone is taken out of their comfort zone and given the chance to expand as a person. At the time, I felt like my decisions, fears, and insecurities prevented me from gaining something valuable. And when I compared my choices to others’, I felt even worse.

Status update after status update made me feel like some kind of post-grad failure.

“_____ just got engaged to their sweetheart of X amount of years.”

“_____ is decorating their dorm. Pics up soon!”

“_____ is in love with this city! It’s so different!”

Long talks with close friends revealed the same feelings of frustration and inadequacy. We all felt like we were missing out on something because we decided to take things a little slower and we were worried about how others would label us because of those decisions.

But another talk with a different friend opened my eyes to something important. The ultimate point of the talk was that after high school, we all move at our own pace and that one of the worst things that you can do is compare your decisions to the decisions of others. I’ll never forget what he said to me: “If they did what they felt was right and if your decisions are based on the same thing, then why are yours any worse?”

It wasn’t until recently that I could fully appreciate what he said. His words made me realize that my decisions weren’t bad ones and they certainly weren’t the worst ones that someone could make after high school. They were just a reflection of the type of person that I was two years ago and the same applies to those whose choices were different than mine.

Ultimately, I guess there’s no such thing as “falling behind” because staying here didn’t rob me of any of the experiences that I was so afraid of missing out on. After three long years, I feel like I can safely say that you can only do what you think is best for you.